


Love You Forever

by quietlycrash



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Canon Compliant, M/M, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, Zayn Leaves One Direction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-30
Updated: 2019-08-30
Packaged: 2020-09-30 12:17:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20447039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quietlycrash/pseuds/quietlycrash
Summary: Soulmark AU where your tattoo says the last words your soulmate will say to you. Liam's says "I love you forever."





	Love You Forever

Liam is pretty sure that Zayn is his soulmate by the time they start their third world tour. The mark on his inner arm reads “I love you forever,” and Zayn always says he will love Liam forever when they part ways. He’s always felt closer to Zayn than the other boys. They’re his brothers, but Zayn is his best friend. He just understands Liam in a way that no one else ever has.

It makes it harder to say goodbye to Zayn than to the other boys, because any time could be the last, and he won’t know until it’s too late. He never says anything to Zayn, though, because he could still be wrong. He keeps his mark covered up with bandages like all the other boys, one of their only pieces of privacy in their crazy world. 

~

“I need to go home for a few days.” Zayn tells all of the boys, eyes red-rimmed from crying. 

“But we have a show tonight?” Niall phrases it like a question, as if Zayn had somehow just forgotten that he was part of a band that performed every night. 

Liam hasn’t felt the bundle of nerves in his stomach ease up since last night when the stories broke, and Zayn called Perrie to try to explain everything away. He keeps his eyes trained on his lap, afraid that he’ll give too much away if he looks at Zayn right now. 

Zayn sighs heavily in response to Niall’s question. Liam can hear the weight of this life weighing on his shoulders, and Liam is afraid of where this is going to go. He doesn’t think he can do this without Zayn. 

“Yeah, I just. I need to get away from all of this, everything is just, like, too much right now.” Zayn’s voice is strained. 

“When are you coming back?” Louis’s voice cuts the room like steel, and his anger seeps into Liam as well. He can’t believe Zayn is really going to leave them, even if it’s only for a few days. 

“I don’t know.” Zayn admits, losing his conviction. He seems to deflate in front of them. “I can’t be here anymore, I just feel trapped.” His eyes dart around the room, like he’s searching for an escape, and Liam feels the rage burn inside himself again. 

“Are we not enough for you anymore?” He asks Zayn, spitting the words out angrily. 

Zayn raises his head and looks at Liam in surprise, like he expected Liam to side with him even as he’s abandoning them. 

“It’s not that, it’s just…” He cuts himself off, frowning. 

“We used to be your home.” Harry reminds him, and he sounds calm but Liam knows that his anger is just simmering below the surface. 

“Why can’t any of you understand?” Zayn asks, angrily. He’s tense now, the vein on his forehead popping out slightly. “None of you face the same scrutiny as me, none of your relationships are affected as much as mine are, none of you are called terrorists!” He spits out, hands balled into fists. 

“That’s a load of bullshit.” Louis crosses his arms and leans back, and Liam knows he means business. He glances over at Niall, whose face is pale and withdrawn.

“Like hell it is! None of you know what it’s like to face racism!”

“We’re all scrutinized Zayn, and we’re all affected by it. Stop acting like that’s why you’re leaving.” Harry glares at Zayn as he speaks. Liam feels the tension in his stomach snap. 

“You’ve never appreciated us the way we appreciate you.” He tells Zayn, and embarrassingly feels his anger turn into sadness by the end of his sentence. He didn’t realize what he said was true until it came out of his mouth, but looking back on it, Zayn always had one foot out the door. 

“Liam-“ Zayn starts to whisper, and Liam can’t stand to hear him pretend to be sad. 

“If you’re so eager to leave us, then go! We can live without you.” Liam pretends that he’s sure of it, that the four of them will be fine without him. 

“I’m not eager to leave you!” Zayn protests, but Louis cuts him off. 

“You’re sure as fuck acting like it. Just get the hell out of here.”

“Please, just let me explain.” He begs. 

Liam can feel Zayn’s dark eyes on his face. He can’t bring himself to look back. It would hurt too much. He keeps staring at the carpet in silence, memorizing the geometric pattern of it. After a minute it’s clear no one else is going to say anything. They’re all too upset. 

“Just give us time Zayn.” He says it quietly, but he knows he said it with enough finality that no one will try to say anything else. 

“Okay.” Zayn’s reply is small and quiet. He sounds more broken than he did even before they started this conversation. He stands and walks out of the room. 

Liam doesn’t wait for any of the others to say something. He can’t handle it right now. It feels like everything is falling apart and he’s losing his family. 

~

Liam startles awake in bed in his pitch-black hotel room. He squints into the darkness and realizes someone is sitting at the end of his bed. 

“Zayn?” He asks groggily. He tries to rub his eyes so he can see clearer. 

“I’m sorry.” It’s barely whispered, but it’s definitely Zayn’s voice. 

“Please stay.” He doesn’t try to hide the pain in his voice right now. It’s less scary in the dark, when he can’t see Zayn’s face.

Zayn doesn’t reply. 

He’s really going to leave. Liam realizes that truth and it’s almost a relief for a moment before the pain comes back. He lets out a shaky sigh and closes his eyes again. He can feel Zayn’s weight leave the bed and hears him walk over to the door.

“I love you forever.” Zayn whispers before he slips out the door. 

Liam’s eyes snap open and he breaks into a cold sweat as he rubs his thumb over the mark on his inner arm. Surely these won’t be the last words Zayn ever says to him. They can’t be. He stares into the dark and tries to convince himself of that. 

~

Months slip by without so much as a text message from Zayn. Liam gets used to the silence. He gets used to the hole in his heart. 

He doesn’t try to go looking for news about Zayn, but he can’t exactly avoid it when the fans are always sending it to him. His heart jumps when he sees the link titled “Zayn Malik’s Soulmark Revealed.” It’s in a tabloid of course, but he quickly sees it’s all over the news. There’s no way it’s photoshop if that many places are reporting it. He holds his breath as he opens the article. 

It’s a photo of Zayn shirtless at the beach. He’s smiling at someone off camera, and his right arm is lifted to throw a frisbee. The words are on the right side of his rib cage, where they would still be hidden if only his arm was down at his side. The image has an inset of the words magnified and enhanced for the whole world to read. Liam’s heart stops when he sees them.

“Please stay.” 

~

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the angst. I'm trying to come to terms with it not always being possible to get the ending or even the goodbye you want.


End file.
